America's Embarrassing Export to Italy

After a three-day absence to celebrate the Memorial Day holiday, I am returning with renewed energy.  Today's post deals with an unfortunate product of American culture, Snooki.  Yes, folks, the players from reality TV show Jersy Shore have invaded Italy with their special brand of bad behavior.
Having visited Florence, I witnessed its grandeur first-hand and admired the art displayed there, including the magnificent statue of David that commands the front of Palazza della Signoria.  Why the producers of Jersey Shore thought taking these morons to Florence was a great idea escapes me.

Their drunken escapades might entertain viewers here, but Italy sees little to love about these hooligans.  Their exploits have drawn attention from Italians that border on expressions of horror during a disaster.  In fact, disaster might be the best way to describe this visit.  Last night offered a newsworthy event when Snooki crashed into a partol car, sending two police officers with minor injuries to the hospital.  Is there no end to the total lack of control she exhibits?  Perhaps more pertinent questions should be posed.  Why do people care what these boorish people do?  Who creates these ideas in the first place?  Get a life people!

Italians have dubbed their visitors gruppo di idioti (group of idiots) or something similar, and their notoriety gives me agita.  I have a great idea for Italy to consider.  Give us Amanda Knox, and we'll leave the Jersey Shore bunch to you.  Maybe with more exposure, they might learn to spend time in more meaningful ways than bar hopping and drunken brawling.  I definitely think an exchange is in order.
 

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Ham on Wry Award of the Week--Governor Rick Scott

Photo from miamiherald.com

Promises to whom?

Once again, readers, Rick Scott, the governor of Florida, has stolen the limelight under false pretenses.  Rather than signing the state budget in Tallahassee Thursday, he staged an event at The Villages, a sprawling community for those 55 and over, instead.  "Why would he do that?" one might inquire?  It has a simple answer.  He has strong political support there and can grandstand to his heart's content, one of his greatest strengths (and he doesn't have many).  Prior to taking office in January, Scott lived a life of luxury in a wealthy enclave in Naples, Florida, home to some of the wealthiest people in the country.  'How did he get elected?" the astute reader might wonder.  Simple again.  He spent $77 miillion of his own money, in addition to other contributions, to inundate the airwaves with his insipid smile and his mother assuring us, "He's a good boy."  I found that one of the most objectionable political ads I had ever seen.  What else would one expect a mother to say about her son?

Back to the signing event.  Although it was held in the town square, Democratic Club members and anyone with a sign that didn't support Governor Scott were barred from the event.  I thought we had free speech in America, but I guess that doesn't apply to Governor Scott's events.  In fact, he doesn't actually adhere to the Florida Sunshine Law either, but that's a whole different story.  I would think that anyone confident of his actions would welcome views from all sides, but not so for this governor.  That might be why 57% of respondents in a Quinnipiac poll disapproved of him, while only 29% approved.  Mind you, some of that discontent comes from people who voted for him.

Scott claimed that he slashed an additional $615 million from the budget to cut projects that "special interests" had promoted.  The Miami Herald posted the following information online May 26th:  "In his speech Thursday, Scott omitted many of the serious-sounding programs he cut: homeless veterans, meals for poor seniors, a council for deafness, a children’s hospital, cancer research, public radio, whooping-cough vaccines for poor mothers, or aid for the paralyzed."  Those darned homeless veterans always want something, don't they?  Heaven forbid that we should provide meals to poor seniors.  After all, they should be working for their own food, right?

Even members of the Republican Party found reasons to question his actions.  The following quote from House Speaker Dean Cannon appeared in the same Miami Herald article cited above: 
"House Speaker Dean Cannon, R-Winter Park, took umbrage with Scott’s “new found emphasis” on increased education spending. Cannon pointed out that much of Scott’s vetoes didn’t produce $615 million in cash because the items were for bonding authority or the sale of lands. Cannon said Scott only freed up $100 million, which would only increase education spending by .06 percent. 'What is more surprising is the governor’s sudden emphasis on K-12 education. The budget we sent him funds education at a higher level than the governor recommended just a few months ago, when he proposed a 10 percent cut. The governor communicated numerous priorities during session, and we did our best to accommodate him. It would have been helpful if the governor had shared this new found emphasis with us before the budget was finalized,' Cannon wrote."

Florida can't afford much more of Rick Scott.  His avid supporters fail to realize that the budget cuts will affect all of them adversely.  Services like police and fire protection, children's services, programs for special needs people, and road projects have been cut, while growth laws were changed, leadership funds (read that to mean any company can donate directly to a legislator) were re-established, and other laws enacted that place heavier burdens on taxpayers while making it easier on corporations.  Soctt says he wants to promote jobs, yet his actions have cut existing positions.  Is this a case of The Emperor's New Clothes?  Wake up Florida.  This is your alarm sounding.

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Sarah Palin's on the Move

According to several news sources, Todd and Sarah Palin have purchased a new home in Scottsdale, Arizona.  The 4.4 acre walled compound sold for $1,695,000 and comes complete with a home theater room, a lavish backyard replete with an elaborate swimming pool, and a walk-in wine storage area, among other features.  Not bad for a couple who probably couldn't have afforded digs like this prior to her bid for Vice-President.  It seems they're "moving on up" in the world.

One might question why they chose Arizona.  Various media outlets speculate that Palin will launch her campaign for President from here, giving her easier access to Republican movers and shakers.  Since I'm not on Palin's list of BFF's, I have no idea whether she actually wants to run for President or just wants to keep her face in front of the cameras.  I shudder at the image of Palin at a G8 conference with the likes of Angela Merkel.  Despite her attempt to convince us that she reads prolifically, I have doubts.  Game Change  gave several accounts of her total lack of geopolitical savvy and her refusal to study the information on index cards intended to bring her up to speed.  Who can forget the interview with Katie Couric when Palin couldn't articulate what she read on a regular basis?  She's adept at folksy saying like, "How's that workin' for ya" though. 

Several stories postulated that the chose Arizona because Bristol Plain just plunked down $172,000 cash for a home that sold for $329,960 five years ago.  I guess Dancing with the Stars must have been a lucrative experience.  Amazing, when we consider that prior to that gig, she had little experience in the work world and no advanced education.  Television exposure has done wonders for the entire family.

But, hey, this is America, land of opportunity.  I can certainly give Palin Kudos for knowing how to work the system.  She has a knack for gaining maximun exposure for anything that she does.  I, for one, keep thinking, "Where's the beef?"  More substance and less form, please.

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A Farewell from Oprah

Rarely, have I had the opportunity to watch Oprah's show because of my work schedule.  Today, I made certain that I blocked out that hour because I wanted to see the manner in which she would handle the end of her 25-year run.  Monday and Tuesday's extravaganzas featured glitz, glamour, famous people from a variety of genres, and tributes galore, according to the media.  In stark contrast, the final show used a simple set with an emphasis on Oprah's connection with the audience.  She spoke with the audience as one would converse with a group of friends and recounted lessons she had learned from the 4,561 episodes that aired.

I could wax on about my impressions, but I won't.  Put simply, Oprah spoke humbly and was visibly moved by the frankness and openness that typified her issue episodes.  She firmly declared her belief in God and revealed that she makes decisions based on the insights she receives in her communication with the Creator.  The overriding message in her nearly hour-long presentation dealt with personal responsibility.  She recounted some of the people that had graced her stage who had enormous difficulties and yet chose to live with what they had, like the mom who had lost both of her arms and legs and the woman whose face had been so horribly disfigured that she no longer resembled her former self.  Toward the end of the show, Oprah introduced her fourth grade teacher. Mrs. Duncan, whom she credits with giving her a healthy dose of self-esteem and made her feel loved and appreciated.

As Oprah moves on and spends more time on OWN, her tv network, may she continue her policy of dealing with topics that are often kept hush-hush.  She has allowed people to rid themselves of shame and disgrace by speaking honestly about problems that no one wants to face: sexual predators, child pronography, abusive spouses, etc.  Her immense following can help in making much-needed changes in our society.  She transcended the role of talk show host long ago and has, instead, become a member of her followers' families..  Oprah has demonstrated how to come to terms with who she is and has found her purpose.  In doing so, she encouraged all of us to find our special purpose.  Thank you, Oprah, for opening the door to enlightenment for millions.  I hope one day we can all rejoice in our membership to the family--the human family.

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"It's the End of the World as We Know It"

Harold Camping, the Califronia pastor whose doomsday prophecy made headlines, was proved incorrect when the world survived the May 21st deadline for destruction.  Certainly, evidence was mounting with Japan's tsunami, multiple earthquakes, disastrous tornadoes in Alabama and Missouri, and record-setting floods along the Mississippi, but we survived.  Mr, Camping hunkered down for two days to reflect on why the catastrophe did not occur, and has now offered an explanation.  He was wrong!

Actually, he explained that May 21st was, instead, a judgment day, one that made a final separation between believers and non-believers.  The real Rapture will occur October 21st.  I know most readers will share my immense relief at that news, because it gives us more time to prepare.  Of course, since Camping believes that Christ is judging the world, I guess that autmotically eliminates much of Earth's population from being saved.  I find it quite interesting that a retired civil engineer is privy to this magnitude of "insider information."  He must have had an epiphany at some point while working on a particulaly inspirational project that led him to such wisdom.  Oh, I forgot to mention something important.  He predicted the end of the world would happen in 1994, too, but that was just a test, I guess.

Maybe we should all take a moment to thank Mr. Camping for creating such a hubub about the "end game."  It might make us stop and think about what's really important to us.  Most of us don't subscribe to Camping's theory, but what if the world did end?  Would we need McMansion's, luxury cars, expensive jewelry and clothing, lavish furniture?  Fill in the blanks with anything that comes to mind.  For those who haven't made a "bucket list", take advantage of this opportunity to do so.  We have just under five months to discover whether the world will end.  Let's enjoy ourselves in the meantime.

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An Absence of Literacy

I have long bemoaned the demise of literacy in this country.  As an example, the distiction between bring and take has all but disappeared, and this holds true for journalists and newspeople, who should know better.  It has become commonplace to hear someone utter something like, "Bring your car to the repair shop."  If you don't understand the distinction, check a grammar site on the internet for an explanation.. When I hear someone confuse bring and take, it sounds like a two-year-old's scream to my ears.

For today's post, I turn once again to the St. Petersburg's Times to illustrate the post's title.  Howard Troxler column Sunday dealt with e-mails he had received in response to a previous column about new laws that change voting procedures and voters registration in Florida.  The following quote reveals a person who does not care enough to check what he writes before sending it.

Liberals and democrats rant and rave when anyone wants to equalize the voters rights. For over forty years moving or changing a name, meant simply to updated your information on Election Day. Of course it meant no one could challage your vote, so you could hop around to any polling place, all without the dreaded act of respondability, the Word that liberals and Democrats fear the most, it means they have to do something, and its not free, or at someone elses expense. Yet today we want people to take the step towards respondable personal acts, as american have been freeloading for too long. So to you Mr. Troxler, I want the Governor to ink this Bill and let get back to one vote per citizen. Just like are fore fathers wrote it.

"Challage?"  "Repondability?"  "Are fore fathers?"  These examples point out some glaring errors in communicating the mesage, and I'm certain the astute reader can find several others.  I won't comment on the message content, just the grammar and syntax.  Heaven help us if the writer graduated from a Florida school system, or worse a Florida college or university.  Fortunately, Mr. Troxler did not reveal the author's name, or it might have caused that person great embarrassment.  I just hope that this was not an example of the best responses.

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A Mind Boggling Article on the Spread of AIDS

An article appeared on the front page of today's St. Petersburg Times, which spurred me to write a brief post.  It detailed the story of a young gay man, who had purposely been infected with HIV that had turned into full-blown AIDS.  His only sexual partner had offered assurance that he was HIV negative.  So much for a relationship built on trust. 

The article reveals two terms I had never heard:  "gift giver" and "bug chaser."  The first identifies a person who intentionally infects people with AIDS.  The second refers to people who seek partners that have AIDS, so they will be infected with it.  That's right!  People exist who want to have the disease.  That's the part that boggles my mind.  I had some awareness of gift givers, even though I didn't know these people had a designation.  A few years ago, I caught part of an Oprah show that featured three women who had relationships with men that knew they were HIV positive and did not inform any of their partners of that fact.  But to want AIDS?  Really?  What are "bug chasers" thinking?  Do they not understand the ravages of the disease, despite all of the advances made?

The article speculated about some possible reasons "bug chasers" embark on a quest for AIDS, but no studies have been conducted to determine their motivations.  As if ordinarly life doesn't have enough woes, these people thirst for more.  I am flummoxed by it all.  If anyone reading this can explain, please comment. 

As for the "gift givers" out there, the only protection from them out is to use preventive measures.  No other means can guarantee safety with a partner.   I welcome any and all views about his craziness.  

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Zombies Invade Jacksonville-Ham on Wry Award of the Week

According to Billie Tucker, founder of the First Coast Tea Party, Jacksonville has experienced the first-ever attack of zombies in Florida's history.  As 2012 approaches, Floridians should prepare for the end of days, because zombies evidently appear when political contests have unanticipated results.  On April 17th, Alvin Brown, a Democratic candidate for mayor, scored a major defeat over Republican candidate Mike Hogan, who had strong support from the Tea Party and said he was cast in the mold of Rick Scott.  He might have fared better if he hadn't aligned himself with Scott, who has disappoinged many of the people who voted for him in signing unpopular bills into law.  Brown's victory is made all the more amazing because Jacksonville is staunchly conservative, yet they elected a black candidate.  Finally, voters chose a candidate with sound ideas to promote job creation and hold taxes to their present level rather than a candidate whose rallying cry was "No!"

Back to the zombies.  Tucker wrote the following words in one of her e-mails: "an invasion of body snatchers is occurring all over town.”  What was Billie's answer to winning the war against these zombies?  “PRAY. Zombies hate people who pray… They are in bondage and don’t know what they do.  Pray they will be released from the cords of bondage that bind them and will join our ranks of Conservative Citizens who love our city, state and country.”  Unfortunately, the zombies must have thwarted the Tea Party's efforts to halt their onslaught and are probably lurking somewhere in a deserted area along I-95, waiting for the next election.

I don't live in Jacksonville, so I did not personally witness the zombie scare, but I do find it interesting that Tucker asserts they are to blame for Hogan's defeat.  I'm certain she must be right because the Republican party has done so much for its citizens this year, no other possible reason could explain the upset.  We are quite excited that they have limited early voting, the ease of registering new voters, eliminated growth laws established for our protection in 1985, and allowed insurance companies to raise rates to an astromonical level while limiting the definition of sinkholes to decrease the number of claims.  Yes.  Living in Florida allows for an interesting lifestyle--one that will now iinclude zombies as next door neighbors, if Tucker's assessment is correct.  What's next?  Vampires, werewolves, Frankenstein monsters, aliens, sea creatures that have morphed into killing machines from nuclear waste and oil spills?   Congratulations, Bille Tucker.  You and the parade of zombies win the Ham on Wry award this week.

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"Ahnold" Worse Than I Thought

Arnold Schwarzenegger just might take the #1 spot for egotistical player extraordinaire.  No, that does not serve as a compliment to his prowess!  Yesterday, after posting the first blog about the split between Schwarzenegger and his wife, Maria Shriver, leaks of more unsavory details about his tryst with Mildred Baena (see picture above), a housekeeper on Maria's staff, broke.  The son that Arnold fathered with her entered the world during the same week as Chritopher, the youngest of Schwarzenegger's children with Maria.  Betrayal doesn't begin to cover the nature of his selfish act.  Not only did Arnold impregnate a household employee, he did so during the same time period during which Maria Shriver got pregnant.  Just imagine how she must have felt when this news went public.

Now, another woman named Gigi Goyette has retained an attorney, claiming that her first affair with Schwarzenegger occurred at the age of 16.  Get this--he was 28.  It doesn't stop there.  She also alleges that they rekindled the affair in 1989, after he had married Maria Shriver.  There's more.   Goyette says that they met once a year after that, and when he ran for governor in 2003, she was paid $20,000 to maintain silence.  At least he didn't father a child with her, or did he?   Why is she taking legal action nafter all of these years?  And--will more mistresses come forward, now that the dam has broken?

Why do men who can't keep their pants zipped marry in the first place?  I'm not talking about just any man.  I'm talking about men who engage in serial sexual encounters.  The whole situation worsens when men have gained some variety of fame, because the hurt can't be contained forever.  All of Schwarzenegger's children will suffer, but the two half-brothers will most likely bear the brunt of taunts from their peers.  This should not be fodder for comedians.  Nothing about this is funny.  It's a tragedy that will affect the family for many years.  Thank God, Maria Shriver has the kind of class that can rise above the garbage.  Not so for Schwarzenegger.  No apolgy for his infidelities will suffice.  He's just part of the trash he created, and he has earned his new moniker The Sperminator.  I don't think he'll be back any time soon.

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"Ahnold" Scrwed Up (pun intended) This Time

The picture above shows Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria in happier times, before his stunning admission that he had fathered a child with a household employee and was paying support for his care.
When interviewed. Schwarznegger said that he had apologized to Maria and his children as well as extended family members on both sides.  Way to go, Arnold!  Your "I'm sorry" carries as much weight as Florida Governor Rick Scott's saying that he takes responsibility for the medicare fraud perpetrated by Columbia/HCA under his watch.  Take that to mean, "My board ousted me with a $300 million goodbye before the company paid a $1.7 billion fine, so what do I have to lose in taking responsibility?  "  How much depth shall we attribute to Arnold's apology?

Maria lost her mother in 2009 and her father the next year.  This will make three years in a row she has endured wrenching personal losses.  The fact that Arnold allowed his lover to continue working for the family long after she gave birth to her child exacts a particularly low blow in this sordid affair.  Schwarzenneger's betrayal shows a total lack of respect for his family and his marital vows.  Stick a big cigar in your .......mouth, Arnold and puff away in your usual swaggering fashion.  You have much in which to take pride.  Now you have subjected your wife and children to the glare of media frenzy that follows such an annoucement.  Maria's plea to the media for privacy has made little difference in exacting what she requested.  Good luck on finding privacy in all this.

The only other announcement of this kind that emerges as more heinous than Schwarzenegger's is John Edward's long-procrastinatd admission that he had fathered a child with Rielle Hunter, a former campaign worker.  Despite the fact that his wife Elizabeth had incurable cancer, he continued his denials until forced to tell the truth by the mounting pile of evidence amassed by the media.  The fact that Maria Shriver is not suffering from a debilitating illness does not let Schwarzenegger of the hook for his foul deed.  He seems to allow his lower brain to guide him in this type of decision.  Trust me, I'm not letting the woman with whom he had an affair off the hook, as long as she had some choice in the matter, but Arnold's reputation as a "groper" coupled with his recent admission makes him one of the greatest louts of all time.  Shame on you, Arnold!

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Sovereign Citizen

Before Sunday, I confess I had little knowlege of the term sovereign citizen.   May 15th changed all that when the St. Petersburg Times ran a story on a Sarasota pollic detective named Tom Laughlin and 60 Minutes aired a segment about the sovereign citizen movement.  Suddently, the strange saga of its roots and current status smacked me in the face, and I had to learn more.

Tom Laughlin was led to the sovereign citizen movement by his older brother Jimmy, after he attended a seminar in Jacksonville and encouraged Tom to file the same documents he had filed.  In essence, these documents proclaim that all US citizens have a strawman account, money which the federal government is illegally withholding from them.  Sovereign citizens lay claim to this money and also assert that the government has no authority over them,  Unfortunately, Tom Laughlin signed a document he did not fully read or understand.  The document meant that he was espousing an anit-government ideology while being employed by a city government.  Ultimately, he was fired because of that conflict of philosophies.

Far more insidious, the 60 Minutes piece revealed disturbing elements of the movement, including the deliberate murder ot two West Memphis policemen who had pulled over Jerry Kane and his 16-year-old son on a routine traffic stop.  Kane handed the police officer a declaration of his sovereignty instead of the required driver's license.  The situation quickly escalated, and a scuffle started.  Kane's son fired shots from an AK-47, and, as father and son started to flee the scene, the younger Kane fired four additional shots.  The two police officers had taken 25 bullets between them.  That incident played a role in Tom Laughlin's eventual firing.

One of the most strident voices and a leader of the movement, Adam Adask, explained some of the tenets of the sovereign citizen movement.  When I watched that interview, I was struck by the expressionless visage staring at me from the screen.  He spoke without emotion and admitted that he had condoned killing policemen when necessary, although he had not done so personally.  Essentially, practicing members of this sect are ararchists of a particularly troublesome kind.  The same interviewer asked J. J. Mcnabb, who has studied the movement for a decade and has been asked to testify before Congress, to define a sovereign citizen.  She replied, " Sovereign citizen, in its simplest form, believes that he is above the law."

This movement has garnered 300,000 followers, although not all of them practice its doctrine.  I don't know about you, but I find this outrageous.  Do I believe that the government oversteps it boundaries?  Sure.  Will I stop paying taxes and kill people who enfore the law because of that?  No.  Will I destroy my driver's license and refuse social security?  No.  If interested in seeing the 60 Minutes segment, click on the video below.  You can also check out the website for more information that didn't air Sunday.  Historical information can be found on Wikipedia and other websites you'll find in a routine web search.  We should all probably be careful to avoid road rage incidents with anyone who espouses the views of a sovereign citizen because he will most like have a gun in the car.

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"Big Brother Is Watching You"

For those of us that read George Orwell's novel Nineteen Eighty-Four, the post's title will probably still elicit a chilling response.   For the entire year of 1984, I had a nagging suspicion that the United States would fall prey to some insidious takeover.  When 1984 ended, and America was still free of the total domination and control exercised over Oceania by Big Brother, the dictator whose surveillance of citizens was ubiquitous, I felt a sense of relief.   While we have a few modern-day equivalents to totalitarianism, China seems the best example of effectively controlling its population and striking fear in the hearts of dissidents.

My post today, however, does not deal with nations, it focused on the internet.  When I established my first e-mail account in 1997, spyware did not exist, nor did the need for it.  Granted, computers had much slower speeds, and the internet did not offer the mind-boggling array of worldwide information that it does today, but I also didn't receive daily doses of newsletter subscriptions that I didn't initiate.  Neither had my friends ever been hacked, and we didn't live in fear of computer viruses.

Since my profession requires hours of time communicating online with prospective candidates, I had little desire to join Facebook or establish a Twitter account.  Several friends hounded me until I finally succumbed last year and created a Facebook account.  Now, since I have a blog, I recently signed up for Twitter as well.  Enter Big Brother.  Google selects the results it will present in my searches, Facebook chooses what ads I see and who it suggests as possible friends, and about.com keeps sending me newsletters I don't want because it tracks the sites I access on the internet.  Eli Pariser has written The Filter Bubble, a book detailing the Big Brother-type control sites have over us and don't bother to inform us about it.

 I say, "Enough!"  I am totally over this type of intrustion and manipulation.  When I search for information, I want it to include sources that might not exist on my list of favorites or play to my political likes and dislikes.  How else can we be truly informed citizens, if we don't have access to a variety of perspectives on a topic?  Spare me from some faceless organization deciding what I should read and what I shouldn't.  To hear Eli Pariser's speech at the TED conference in March, access the following video.  Then stand with me in demanding more openness and less control from internet sites focused on advertising dollars and pandering to its visitors.

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Reinventing Yourself

A well-known actor used that term today in response to a reporter's question about how he turned his life around from drug and alcohol addiction.  I find reinvention a rather curious noun, when used in reference to human behavior, because, typically, no one invents a human, unless you count the Frankenstein monster, you think of R2-D2 orC-3PO as human, or you believe avatars are real.  So, reinvention seems quite ridiculous to describe the act of making important changes in one's life.

No matter what philosophy of life a person has adopted. one constant applies.  Humans are born with a combination of genes that produce certain traits and physcial characteristics.  What they choose to do with that inheritance will define how others perceive them.  Thus, when you don't like who you see in the mirror, make some changes, but don't break the mirror.  Every choice comprises both positive and negative consequences, so the mirror isn't the issue.

With the variety of cosmetic surgeries available today, you can reshape your entire body at will, unless you choose the wrong surgeon.  New lips, new chin, new nose, new breasts, new stomach--you name it, and you can have it--for a price.  Does that fix the problem?  I don't think so, unless someone has experienced a disfiguring trauma or a birth defect.  In my experience, the underlying conern is embedded inside the brain, and surgery won't cure that predicament. 

Women are especially vulnerable to low self-esteem in this culture because the ideal Barbie's body doesn't exist in most real women.  If it did, we would see women toppling over on a regular, when they bend to retireve objects they dropped.  Instead of aspiring to the model of "perfect body," perhaps we'd all be happier if we celebrated the talents we have and downplay the weaknesses.  Instead of  "reinventing yourself," make changes will transform how you see yourself. 

Eat less and exercise more, if you want to lose weight.  Laugh more and enjoy the people in your life, if you want to be happier.  Weed out toxic people who bring you down, if you want true friends to surround you.  Stop drinking, smoking, taking drugs, or any other behavior that interferes with work or relationships.  Get help from qualified professionals, if you can't shake depression or constant feelings of self-loathing.  No one makes it through life without problems.  When problems define who you are, you are the problem. 

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Stealing from Babies

Identity thieves in this country have hit a new low:  stealing social security numbers from babies and young children.  How can that be, you might ask?  Social security numbers are generated using a certain logic where the first three number identify the state and the last four can be easily predicted using a software that has been marketed for many years.  Thus, these criminals prey on victims and commit crimes that go undiscovered for years.

This morning, the Today Show aired a segment that investigated three specific cases with an emphasis on that of a teenager whose identity was stolen when she was three and now has a $750,000 debt in her name.  Outrageous?  You bet, but what's even more disturbing is that the reporter found two of the people who have been using her number to take out mortgages and auto loans.  He confronted both of them with the evidence, and, at first, they acted as though they didn't know what he was talking about.  When an interpreter stepped in, they avoided further discussion.  Jeff (whose last name I didn't get), the reporter, found one of the men in just two days.  Why didn't the police arrest these criminals?  Good question.  I guess they're a little too busy.

In another case, a two-year-old boy had to declare bankruptcy after criminals accrued thousands of dollars of debt in his name.  A nine-year-old girl's social security number was stolen 11 years before she was born.  Get this, the banks that approved the auto and mortgage loans are not required to ensure that the number and the person's name match.  They would have to pay a fee to do that.  Heaven forbid that they would protect the consumer.  Here's yet another reason to distrust financial institutions.  I can't say I'm crazy about the huge gap in security at Social Security either.  According to the reporter, they will change their number assignment system to one using random order so thieves can't beat the system--at least for awhile.

If you have young children, check their credit reports.  While the reporter discussed three cases, thousands exist.  To check out the video from the Today Show, go to http://todayshow.com.

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He's Baaaack! Newt Gingrich Announces a Bid for President

The Republican field of presidential hopefuls has now expaneded by one.  Newt Gingrich announced his intentions on Twitter listing the same old rhetoric that included a balanced budget.  Ha!  Good luck, Newt.  If you plan to balance the budget by compromising citizens' rights to constitutional protections, forget it.  Newt is now 67, and, I don't know about you, but I'm tired of the same ole, same ole. 

Despite the Supreme Court's support for defining corporations as people, many of us have grown weary of benefits given to corporations that they don't deserve.  Excuse me, but, the last time I looked, a corporation comprises all varieties of people who do not speak in unison.  I see no evidence that Newt would act on behalf of America's citizens to right than wrong.  In fact, the entire slate of Republican candidates thus far is remarkably underwhelming.

Newtm tou time in the limelight has come and gone, and it's time for you to retire from politics -- for good.  Say "Goodnight,"Newt, and leave us in peace.

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Teen Wins Bio-science Prize

I am so delighted that I can offer a postive story for this week's Ham on Wry award.  Marshall Zhang, a 16-year-old Canadian student who won first prize in the Sanofi-Aventis Bio Talent Challenge receives the honor.  No, I have never heard of this challenge before, but I think we'll be hearing about Marshall Zhang for a long time to come.  He discovered a new treatment for cystic fibrosis, a debilitating disease that causes thickened mucus to build up in the lungs and other parts of the body, for which no cure exists.

Marshall, along with his mentor, Dr. Christine Bear, a researcher at the Hospital for Sick Children's Research Institute in Toronto worked together on the project in her lab. Using the Candian SCINET, they tested various compounds' effects on the defective protein that causes cystic fibrosis.  By using simulations on the supercomputer network, Zhang determined that the compounds acted on different parts of the protein, thereby showing promise for use together on the disease.

Dr. Bear has offered  Zhang the use of her lab for additional research on treating cystic fibrosis.  Zhang believes he can build on his original research for further breakthroughs.  Given that he is completing his junior year of secondary school, he has already made great strides toward a career in bioscientific research.

What was I doing at the age of 16?  Certainly nothing as grand as Zhang has accomplished.  All I can say is, "Wow!"  Congratulations to Marshall Zhang and all who assisted in his first place win May 10th.  To read the full story, click on the link:  www.livescience.com/14138-teen-cystic-fibrosis-drug-cocktail-contest.html

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Florida Legislators Slash Public School Funding

The Florida Legislature might earn this week's Ham on Wry award Friday; however, this post deals largely with the 1.4 billion dollar cut to funding for public education and its effects on the state.  Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I wrote 1.4 billion dollars.  That translates to approximately $542/pupil and massive lay-offs for teachers.  In Pinellas County, over 1,000 teachers have received notices that they will not return this fall. The layoffs affected mostly teachers in their first or second year in the classroom.  Talk about bursting a bubble.  This news should strike fear in the heart of every parent whose children attend public school in Florida.

The day after the legislators fought into the wee hours of the morning May 7th to pass the budget, Robert Trigaux's column in the Busisness Section of The St. Petersburg Times announced that CEO's had just voted Florida as the third best state for business, with Texas #1 and North Carolina #2.  They used three criteria in rendering their decision:

1. Low taxes and minimal regulation (what a surprise!)
2. Good quality of life for all corporate employees
3. Good schools from which to recruit well-educated employees

Guess where Florida fails?  If you chose #3, you win my admiration.  Now guess what blogger wrote Governor Scott about the follow of large cuts to education early in his tenure as Florida's governor.  I hope you concluded it was I.  Yep.  I stated that he would regret cuts to education when he stated that the education budget was bloated.  I informed him that every poll taken to identify why coporations don't relocate their headquarters to Florida places poorly educated populace or similar wording at the top of the list.  As an aside, he also wants to give public funds to charter schools with a religious affiliation.  More on that in a separte post.

Governor Scott sent no reply to my correspondence.  What a surprise!.  He had more important things to do, like learning about the state and its constitution, which, by the way, he proudly prolcaimed he had never read.  Scott, who at one time headed Columbia/HCA, behaves more like a CEO than a governor and evidently feels the Sunshine Law does not apply to him.. But, I digress. 

Everyone who voted to cut education funding by such a staggering figure will rue the day when the ravages of their actions lower graduation rates further and reduce overall student achievement scores..  Education Week gave Florida high marks on implementing recommended standards and accountability measures in January 2010.  The same publication gave student achievement a D- and college readiness an F.  All of the assessments and standards in the world have little meaning, if students don't perform at grade level or above.  I guess I shouldn't be surprised with the legislature's actions.   They considered it vital to select a state amphibian.  The winner-a barking tree frog.  Need I say more?

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Moms

On Mother's Day, we honor those special women that labored to give us birth and devoted 18 years of their lives to making certain we graduated from high school.  I know that doesn't describe 100% of the moms in the US, but most of the moms I experienced growing up sacrificed much to raise their children.

My mom has already said her final good-byes, but I have vivid memories of her.  She taught me many life lessons, but the one that has made the biggest impact on my life was her acceptance of people for who they were.  She didn't care if they didn't wear the latest fashion or had a different skin color or worshiped in a way that we didn't.  Her belief in one humanity applied to both adults and children of all ages.

Her innate sense of fairness and love of children spilled over into the classroom, where she taught first grade for much of her 32-year career.  In fact, Dad always told people he couldn't seem to get out of the first grade, no matter how hard he tried.  Mom would often slip into teacher behavior at home, and we'd just roll our eyes as if to say, "Not this again!"  The impact she made on her students and their parents can be summed up in sharing a story one parent told at her memorial service.

He had triplets that spent all of their waking hours together, and, when their time to enter first grade arrived, the principal informed him that the three would be separated.  This upset not only Mr. Townsend, but also his boys.  When Mom heard about it, she marched to the principal's office and told him that she would take all three of the boys into her class.  She told him that they could separate when they reached the higher grades, but she believed it would impair their learning, if they didn't have each other's support in primary school.  Case closed!  The triplets stayed together, and their father never forgot Mom's intervention on his behalf.

In this time of economic hardship, many have forgotten the difference a teacher made in their lives.  Teachers do far more than educate students.  They care about their charges as individuals and devote time to oversee their development into productive citizens.  So, today, please join me in raising a glass of your beverage of choice to moms, and, when you do, express your gratitude to them and then toast a teacher who affected you in a positive way.  Here's to you, Mom.

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Ham on Wry Award to al Qaeda

This week, Ham on Wry presents its award to al Qaeda for the ironic confirmation released by its general command to various jihadi online forums Tuesday.  To quote them, in part, as translated by CNN, " Even when the Americans managed to kill Osama, they managed to do ONLY that by disgrace and betrayal. Men and heroes only should be confronted in the battlefields but at the end, that's God's fate."  If, as they write, killing men (in the generic sense) should only occur on battlefields, why, then, did they choose a coward's method of killing thousands of people as they worked in their offices?  It would seem that in doing that, they defied their own credo.  Perhaps we can consider the workplace a battlefield at times, but certainly not in the same sense as the quote.

Unwittingly, the group has also made it unnecessary to release the photos described as gruesome by President Obama.  His decision has been analyzed ad infinitum thus far.  Al Qaeda's statment should quell the clamor about the photos, and we can resume life as we know it.  For that, we can offer our thanks for the confirmation.

Ultimately, we can debate the process used in Osama bin Laden's death, but it won't alter the fact that he no longer lives and can't personally devise plots to kill innocent people in the name of an Allah that demands  the death anyone who does not believe as al Qaeda does.  That includes other Muslims whose faith in Islam does not decree obliteration of all other types of beleivers and non--believers.  Let us now move on from our obsession about all things Osama and leave him to his resting place at the bottom of the sea.

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"Everything Old is New Again"

No, the title does not refer to aging people having reconstructive surgery, as much as it has a certain flair in describing Joan Rivers.  Instead, I am referring to Marie Osmonds's remarriage to Stephen Craig Wednesday, wearing the same dress she wore in 1982.  Her dramatic weight loss a few years ago, her appearance on Dancing with the Stars. and the demands of a show in Vegas worked the magic allowing her to don the same dress in her walk down the aisle.  Her husband can not boast the same slim figure he had in 1982,  and he did switch from a while to a black tux, but one has only to see Marie's smile as they wed to know she doesn't give a hoot about that. 

Although rumors about a remarriage abounded in the tabloids, the couple successfully kept the wedding a secret--so much so, that some of Marie's family members couldn't make arrangements in time to attend the event.  I confess that I had no idea she was even dating her ex, but I hope they have a happy life together.  Marie has experienced enough tragedy recently with an ugly divorce from her second husband and her son Michael's suicide last year.  Love is supposed to be lovelier the second time around, and I guess we can count this as the second time, minus the interruption of another man marrying her in the intervening 26 years from the year they divorced.  What do you think, readers?  Does this give us hope for more fairy tale endings in our own lives?

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The Voice

What a refreshing concept!  A TV show designed to unearth new singing talent allows the hopefuls to do a blind audition.  The judges sit in high-backed chairs and can only see the contestants if they hit the I Want You button as they perform or wait until the end of the song.  Those selected might have a choice of whom they want to coach them because all four judges can pitch the same performer.  Just imagine singing for Christine Aguilera, Blake Shelton, Cee-lo Green, and Adam Levine and being selected by all of them.

I watched the show's premiere last week and found it pure entertainment, minus histrionics and hysteria.  I vowed I wouldn't get hooked, but here I am writing about it after watching the first hour tonight.  The scouts who find the talent have wowed the audiences, though some of the singers need refinement.  Even those who aren't selected by a judge go away with some gentle feedback about their weaknesses.  I could wax on further about the show's virtues, but readers can see it for themselves and see if they feel magic in the air.

Good night, all.

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Of Tragedy and Triumph

Last Wednesday, tornadoes devastated  the South, leaving almost two hundred dead in its path of destruction in Alabama. It was considered the worst tornadic activity since 1925 and might break the record when data analysis has been completed.  More tornadoes occurred the 28th moving up the Atlantic Seacoast causing more havoc and widening the scope of tragedy with additional deaths.

The next day, Will and Kate made their triumphal march in Westminster Abbey, where they vowed to love, honor, and care for one another.  Viewed by more that 2 billion people with some estimates stretching to 3 billion, wedding and recelption stories dominated the news on all channels. Thus came a day of respite for people weary of the previous days of viewing crushed homes, downed trees, and chaos.  We could all rejoice and celebrate the marriage vicariously at watch parties or viewing the event from a comfortable seat in the living room.

Saturday was filled with reporters and commentators discussing the best and worst dressed wedding guests, as well as whether Kates'dress lived up to expectations.  They gushed over Kate's sister Pippa, saying she had revivied the late night party when energy flagged and excitement wanted.  Speculation about a possible flirtation between Harry and Pippa dominated many discussions.  The truth-they've known each other for eight years and behaved like good friends will at a party.

With all of this tragedy and triumph intertwining, the announcement made just before midnight Sunday was both unexpected and long-awaited.  A Special Ops team of navy seals had killed Osama bin Laden and others in the same compound.  President Obama, with his usual articulate flair, provided background and a brief explanation of what had occurred earlier that evening.  At long last, Osama bin Laden experienced the same fate of the thousands his plan killed on 9/11.  I was relieved that the President had succeeded in locating his hideout (albeit rather lush) and planning an attack on the compound.  The architect of the 9/11 massacres will plan no more.  I wish I could tell you that the story ends there, but we all know it doesn't.  At best, Al Qaeda will need long months to regroup.  At worst, retaliatory plans might already be underway.  In one event, we have a triumph of enormous magnitude.  Will tragedy follow?  I leave it to the reader to debate that.

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Friends Forever (continued)

I left you yesterday with a cliffhanger about Karen dropping a bomb when we talked after my mom's memorial service.  She spoke hesitantly at first, and then blurted out, "Ronnie has ALS."  Ron had always been athletic, and, for some reason, the memory of a concussion he sustained from a brutal tackle during a high school fottball game dominated my thoughts for a moment.  I knew that ALS meant a death sentence for Ron and couldn't think of the right thing to say.  Finally, I stammered,"When did you find out?'

Ron had been diagnosed earlier that year in June, so the debilitation had not begun in earnest yet.  We hugged each other, and tears hung at the corner of her eyes, eventually trickling slowly down her cheeks and rolling off her chin.  Family members were collecting the story boards, cards, and other things that had been part of the service, and I realized we would soon leave.  We still had to drive for several hours to the cemetery where my dad was buried in his home state so Mom's ashes would be placed alongside his.  I gave Karen one long, last hug and vowed I'd stay in touch.

Thus began an odyssey that led me back to my hometown in 2008 for a brief visit to Ron and Karen's home. They lived on a lake where we had all swum and water-skied when we were teenagers.  By then, ALS had robbed Ron of his upper body musculature, so that when he walked, his spaghetti-thin arms dangled by his sides, moving as if some unseen breeze blew intermittenlty behind him.  He could still speak understandly, and he laughed as we reminisced about our experiences in band and some of our ridiculous antics in high school.

When I waved good-bye the next day, I promised myself that I would return as often as possible while he was alive.  In 2009, I made three trips there and stayed with them for a few days out the total three weeks I spent in the area.  Ron hadn't changed markedly by then, so he still got a kick out of listening to us bellowing out some of our favorite oldies and dancing as though demon-possessed.  I could almost delude myself into thinking something magical would occur, and Ron's muscles would grow back, so that he could dance with us.  But that didn't happen.

The next year, I traveled there in the summer and stayed with them except for a few days.  Ron now sat in a wheelchair most of the time and left the house infrequently.  He just didn't feel like going through all the machinations to ride in the specially equipped van.  Karen and he still maintained a postive attitude, and she tended to him with the skill of a nurse.  He had a feeding tube and several medicines that she administered to help ease his discomfort, and he required more help  when he walked because his leg muscles were considerably weaker than the previous year.  I knew then that I would find a way to go there during my annual Christmas visit.  I'm glad I did, because we laughed and joked like we always did one last time.  Ron died three weeks later in January.

When Karen arrived here April 21st, I wanted nothing more than for her to relax and enjoy herself.  She did that, but something even more special occurred.  The bond of friendship that had begun so many years ago strengthened and added dimension to our relationship.  The girls of yesteryear had become the women of today, and, in that maturation process, we realized that we had a forever friendship, which years of separation had not weakened or tarnished.  When I was a girl scout, one of our songs had the following lines:  "Make new friends, but keep the old.  One is silver, and the other is gold."  Here's to my special, 24-karat friend, Karen.

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